I'm Jealous
by leogirl
Summary: This is a songfic to Shania Twain's "I'm Jealous." Takes place in the Great Hall the night the Fat Lady got slashed by Sirius. Hermione's PoV.


I was not alseep, but thinking of the boy laying next to me. Harry was much more burdened than he deserved. I moved closer to him, and sat up to look at him. He was on his side with his hand covering his face. The moonlight from the Great Hall ceiling covered his tense body except for his face which was shadowed by me. Harry moved his hand away from his face and turned over onto his back. I wondered how his face would look in the moonlight. I moved my head to the side so that Harry's face was drenched with white light.   
  
_If I were the moon, I could catch your eye_   
  
Harry stirred in his sleep when the light hit him. Nobody knew how much I wished it was me who made him stir so.   
  
_I'm jealous of the moon_   
  
I moved my head back so that Harry fell still again. I touched the hair on his forehead. I loved his hair. I loved watching it during quidditch games when it would fly back with the wind. I loved watching Harry fly through the air on his broomstick and suddenly stop to look around for the snitch. There was so much joy on his face when he flied. I wished I could bring him that much joy.   
  
_If I were the wind, I would make you fly  
I'm jealous of that too_   
  
I pushed the hair off his forhead and searched his frowning face for something I could do to let him sleep more peacefully. Harry's face looked different from what it did in the sun. In the sun, his face glowed and he looked warm and happy. Now, he looked cold and like he couldn't escape the thoughts of a murderer coming after him, not even in his sleep. Did he sleep this way every night? I wanted to hold him so he would stop looking so cold.   
  
_I wish I were the sun shining on your face  
-caressing like a lover  
I would wrap you up in a warm embrace  
-we'd be holdin' one another_   
  
I put my arms around his shoulders, gently as to not wake him. I think his body loosened a little in my embrace. But I must have imagined it.   
  
_I'm jealous of the sun  
Oh, I'm jealous of the sun_   
  
I wished Harry would wake up now and find me like this. Then, I would have no choice but to tell him how I felt. I wished he knew how I felt. I wished he would know before he falls for another girl. If he does fall for someone else, that would be another thing for me to worry about, and then I can't tell him. I tightened my grip on Harry at these thoughts.   
  
_Oh, I don't wanna share you with nothing else  
-I gotta have you to myself  
Oh- I can't help it- I'm so in love  
I just can't get you close enough, no _   
  
I buried my face in Harry's chest in despair. What sort of punishment was this? I'm his best friend yet I'm being forced to touch him when he isn't aware of it. Is this how it was going to go on throughout all of school and afterwards? I was silently crying into his shirt now.   
  
_When the sun's on your skin  
-I can't hold it in  
And I know it's a sin  
But I'm jealous of the sun_   
  
I wasn't crying just for myself. I was crying for Harry, too. I knew that I could make him sleep in peace if he was mine. This week had been hard for him, especially with quidditch practice. It had been raining , and he would fly around on his broomstick with the water dripping down his neck and onto his body. The rain would touch his wonderful hair and face so mercilessly. Harry would come back from practice looking completely forlorn and discouraged.   
  
_I wish I were the rain runnin' down your neck  
-and drippin' from your fingers   
Then I could be the drops rollin' off your back  
-I'd love to let it linger  
Oh, I'm jealous of the rain_   
  
I thought about my hopeless dream. I loved being Harry's friend. I loved being such a close friend. But can a close friend get this near him? Would it be easier if I weren't his friend? No, I wouldn't sacrifice our friendship for anything. Not even to get closer to Harry. Even though that was what I wanted the most.   
  
_Oh, I don't wanna share you with nothing else  
-I gotta have you to myself  
Oh- I can't help it- I'm so in love  
I just can't get you close enough, no_   
  
The moonlight was blocked by clouds now, and it had started raining. I needed to do something before this night was over. This might be the only chance I ever get. Did I dare kiss Harry?   
  
_When it rains on your face  
-I almost can taste  
Your beauty, your grace-  
I'm jealous of the rain_   
  
I didn't know if I dared to touch him that much. It was just a kiss, how could it hurt? It could hurt alot, I knew, when I realize he can never kiss me back. I blew at Harry's hair, wondering what to do.   
  
_When the wind's in your hair   
-the way it blows through the air  
Oh, it seems so unfair, yeah_   
  
I moved my face close to his face until my lips were just an inch away from his.   
  
_When the moon's in your eyes  
-You seem to light up the skies, yeah  
And I realize..._   
  
There was a thunderclap overhead, causing me to take a sharp intake of breath. I came into realization of what I was doing. I laughed softly, shook my head and moved my head back to my sleeping back, sighing.   
  
_I'm even jealous of the moon_


End file.
